These three points are lingering in our consciousness level.
When we were young, there were always people who told us to follow the rules and break through the barriers of class through reading, but often it was misguided. When we finally had enough money to summon up the courage to pursue a free life, a choice, but once again let people encounter each other and move to different trajectories .
It's also a change of career. Some people have gone peacefully since then, while others have plummeted, creating a cloud of mud. And more people are afraid to step out of the comfort zone and spend their entire lives in trouble.
Let me say that my friend, who has been carrying the ambition of realizing wealth and freedom until the age of 30, graduated from university and achieved the position of director of operations at a well-known telecommunications company in China. Easy work and happy family.
For the first half of his life, he lived out the lives of others and became the standard for successful people in the eyes of the world.
But as stated in the book "The Moon and Six Pence", there is only one success in life, which is to live a life in the way you like.
Deep in his heart, he cries all the time-this job is not my favorite.
This kind of thought is like a deep-rooted meat thorn, and most of the time there is no consciousness, but whenever he is lonely, he will come out to sting him.
At the age of 30, he never wanted to be mediocre again, to break through the status quo, but he was faced with the same confusion as many others:
Do I have to find the right ( make money ) track to get started?
I want to make money by interest, but once interest is used to make money, will it kill the interest and lose the career development period?
I am relatively introverted, I do n’t have good interpersonal relationships, and I may not develop well if I change jobs.
Will the career change be three years behind?
In fact, it does not.
After he consulted a university teacher, he finally realized that what kind of life he wanted, he had to break through what kind of thinking.
This entangled psychological contradiction is exactly the most common mode of thinking in our lives called: " have-do-be " have-do-be mode, for example, "I have the ability to do project management, I will go As a project manager, I am a project manager. "
However, this mode of thinking will trap us, because when you first think of "have" , your mind immediately presents "No": I don't have the ability of project management right now.
Then the subsequent "do" and "be" will not appear.
That's why you find it difficult to be the person you want to be.
In fact, if we think differently, things will change.
We turn our thinking model into a be-do-have ( be-do-have ) model. First, think of yourself as a product, and then see what the people who plan the product do, and what the product manager does , And then have the talent of a product manager.
Because the concept of "yes" itself does not depend on "has," the concept of "yes" is actually a sense of identity and role, more of an experience and self-identity.
The awakening of the mind is like a domino card, once it is turned on, it is like a bamboo shoot.
Later, in order to switch to a professional consultant, he deliberately practiced more than 1,000 hours of training and consulting skills , seized every opportunity to study, research, and practice, and successfully turned into the first batch of elite consultants of a large consulting company.
Now, he has just entered the age of no doubt. He has been specially hired as a career lecturer by Tsinghua University and Beijing Normal University. His income has doubled and he has gained unprecedented spiritual satisfaction.
He told me: "Consulting is a two-way communication process. While inspiring others, I can also learn something new from others, so most consultations are very enjoyable because I see the legend of everyone."
It is this enjoyment of communicating with people without utilitarianism that has gradually found the meaning of his life.
Sometimes it is difficult to turn around for a hundred years, but fortunately he broke through the limitations of thinking, chose the right methodology, and successfully transformed what he wanted to do.
Misunderstanding the platform as a capability? You need to change the box thinking
This career planner who changed his destiny by breaking through the limits of thinking is my old friend and life mentor Ma Huaxing .
It is no exaggeration to say that if my girlfriend Xiao Ke did not have his advice at the beginning, she might still be living in a small company in a small town on the 18th line. With a monthly salary of 5,000, she would comfort herself.
My girlfriend Xiao Ke, graduated from graphic design with an undergraduate degree. Because of her interest, she worked as a book product manager in a publishing house.
But in the process of being a book product manager, she became interested in book cover design, so she used her spare time to help people do some free design.
From the beginning of a single order a month, to later, many publishers in the industry asked him to design, and more and more orders were received.
Later, because the amount was too large, she couldn't be too busy, so she thought about it, just be a freelancer and do the book cover design. But now I go out to work as a freelancer.
Many people will be like her, thinking that she should develop better after leaving the company. I advised her not to be impulsive and quickly introduced Mr. Ma to consult her. She met him with doubts, and soon Mr. Ma asked her two problem:
First, your ability to do book cover design, that is, how fast is your personal growth in the process?
Second, what is the point in time from when you became interested in book cover design and finally generated revenue?
At this time you need to change the frame to think about your situation. If you become the person you admired the most, what will happen now?
Then, she drew a patient growth curve patiently.
When she saw this curve, she found that she was in the ascendancy of a book cover design profession, and at this time, she needed to devote her whole body to it.
So she decided to show the boss a showdown.
Dramatic things happened. The boss insisted on keeping her, and directly gave her all the book cover design list of the company. She also introduced her customers, was promoted and paid, and paid five insurances and one fund, which made her very moved.
After two years in the industry, she became well-known in the industry as a design backbone of the book publishing house, with a monthly income of more than 30,000.
Later, Teacher Ma wrote the cover of a career counseling book "Mind Breaking: Becoming a Minority in Control of Destiny" . She also designed it herself. It is very concise and powerful. She thanked Teacher Ma for her guidance.
Many times, when people are making choices, the authorities are often confused. If you don't break away from the constraints of your thinking and look at life from a different perspective, you will fall into a dilemma.
The social value gap between people is far greater than the gap between IQ and ability. What causes the gap in social value?
It is the ability to make the right choice .
Only people who do n’t figure it out, no way to go
Teacher Zhang Defen once said kindly:
My dear, there is no one outside, only you. From beginning to end, the gap we have to face is the limitation of our own thinking.
And in Teacher Ma's book "Mind Breaking: Becoming a Minority in Control of Destiny", he said that there are only people who haven't figured out, and there is no way to go.
At first I was skeptical of this sentence, until I was honored to get a reading of Mr. Ma's writing manuscript. I couldn't wait to open the book. It took me a whole day to read it verbatim.
The workplace confusions that have suppressed my heart for a long time suddenly realized. It turned out that by controlling the thinking mode, you can control your own life.
When reading this book, my biggest feeling is that it is not the same as other successful chicken soup or dried goods on the market.
There are some psychological backgrounds and methods, but these seemingly profound principles seem to be less cold in the author's pen, but very grounded.
When you open the book, you will find that every case has happened to you, and you will nod while watching and shouting, "That's not it."
He said in the book, the reason why we dare not change in the workplace is because we dare not think, do not want to think, do not know how to think, so Mr. Ma summarizes the general perplexities encountered by people in the workplace:
1. Maze , walked around and found it back to the original position, always unable to go out
2, jigsaw , holding a few pieces of jigsaw, how to spell can not make a complete picture
3. In the ring , it seems that some villains are punching in a cage, and they lose both.
In response to these three confusions, he refined three core thinking methods , a six-step self-analysis method, and seven solutions to actual combat cases , and wrote them all in "Mind Breaking."
It can be said that there are answers to the workplace questions you want to know.
Of course, the most important thing is not to tell you the answer directly, but to give you a way. If you encounter similar problems in the future, you can learn by analogy.
The book writes that the underlying thinking for solving workplace problems is three major psychological foundations: " genus plus species difference ", " metacognition ", and " paradox ".
Although these three methods are not the author's first initiative, he uses them as the underlying thinking to solve workplace problems, supplemented by a large number of practical cases, serving thousands of professional consultants.
Among them are not only fresh graduates, but also many top 500 corporate executives. Everyone can re-learn and apply three ways of thinking for self-analysis under the guidance of the author to achieve breakthroughs in self-thinking.
You can read this book in order, you can also turn to relevant pages to read the book on the topic you are interested in. You can also read this book in the form of "which page is read by the wind".
No matter what method you use to read it, it will be useful if you open it. It is very suitable to be placed on the pillow.
Why do you know so much, but have a bad life?
Many people say:
I understand the reason, I have also read many books on career planning, isn't it just analyzing and finding out my strengths? Isn't it just taking advantage of opportunities to develop your own strengths? But why am I still not doing well?
During decades of consulting career, Mr. Ma also discovered this problem.
He deeply understands that the transmission of knowledge and the telling of truth are not education. How to let readers learn the methods and use, adjust and internalize them in life is the real education.
Some books focus on personal success and are not easy to copy;
Some books focus on theory and are not easy to read;
Some books focus on preaching and are not easy to practice.
Therefore, Mr. Ma decided to plan a practical consulting case. The methods provided can quickly get started, use the most concise methods to break people's cognitive limitations, and use the most popular language to disassemble work and life clearly.
It's easier said than done, so it took him three years to complete the book, which is "Mind Breaking: Becoming a Minority in Control of Fate" .
This book is elaborated from the six parts of thinking, career, ability, resources, choice, and action , and these six parts just constitute a complete consultation process, allowing you to complete yourself without spending money to ask a consultant Diagnosing occupational problems can be said to be very convenient and practical.
After knowing that he published the book, some people asked him: "The workplace consultation costs hundreds or even thousands. You write these experiences into the book, and a book costs only 45 yuan. Isn't it a loss?"
But he said: "I want to help more people resolve the confusion in the workplace, and I hope to benefit more people. This is my original intention."
About the author: Han Laobai, Rich Bookmarking Author, Leo Positive Energy Hot Mom, Little Fresh Literary Designer, served as editor-in-chief of the School Newspaper after graduating, worked naked for five years after graduation from Design Institute, understands psychology, and focuses on shaping Women's workplace, marriage happiness, I wish my words to accompany thousands of women to grow together, Jianshu, Weibo @ 韩 老 白.